Sorry to be all doomy and gloomy, but that’s how I feel right now. I know I’ve written before about how time passes and things change. Especially from childhood to adulthood. We can never get back our childish naivety or carefreeness.
There are so many beautiful things in life, but there are also times when life feels like nothing but watching the people around you die.
We moved out here several years ago. There are many friends I fell out of contact with. A few months ago I found out that one of them, someone with whom I had once been very close (and had since tried in vain to get back in touch with) had passed away. Technically liver disease, but he wasn’t in the best health when I knew him, and he had some…bad habits. Ever since, I’ve felt this sense of loss that goes not only with losing a friend, but with feeling like I never got to tell him how much he meant to me.
Tonight, I found out his son, also my friend, has died of an overdose. I knew they both been in some trouble off and on the past few years. I had asked after them, trying to get phone numbers from some of our mutual friends, from time to time.
But they had mostly gone their separate ways too.
Our little band of misfits grew apart a bit at a time a few years ago, I think. I guess life got in the way…and lifestyle choices. No more movies at the Senator. No more Halloween parties. No more camping out and car shows together.
And now I guess there never will be.